I knew it was a while since I had blogged. I just hadn’t realized it was six months. That’s something that happens with age – time flies at the speed of light. Yes, life has a way of reminding me I am in my mid 70’s.
But I am ready to start again…
I was having trouble with my laptop and ignored it. It was 10-12 years old, but I grew attached to it. I understood it’s quirks and I dealt with the slow, very slow, amount of time it took to boot up, bring up programs, etc. You get the point.
I finally had to get a new one. I berated myself for waiting so long to get a new one. Especially when I realized the difference in how much, in much less time, I could carry out. I do wish I had gotten my new laptop at least 3 or so months earlier.
I learned a lesson. Well, I guess you can say, I learned two lessons: one was a reminder of something I forgot, and the other was a new lesson.
First, becoming attached to material things is not good. Most of us know and understand that material possessions can get control over us if we become too attached to them.
In my case it was my comfort level with my laptop that came with me from New York to Arizona. Holding on to that provided a comfort level but hindered my ability to properly focus on doing things what brought me pleasure. It also helped me to feel inadequate while working on some projects.
I didn’t need the laptop to remind me of New York City. I had my memories. I will always have my memories. A laptop is replaceable. A memory is not.
Of course, I got my new laptop. Once I got it set up and working, I was able to work more smoothly. This allowed me to release the stress levels that taken hold of me and prevented me from properly and efficiently working on my projects.
Second, the new lesson I learned is about material possessions and emotions.
The situation I met with a bad working laptop gave way to my pondering on why I held on so tightly to it, especially as my frustrations with it grew. I had wonderful, beautiful, and potent memories about New York, family and friends, Memories my Catholic upbringing, my parish, where I learned about social justice in action. Memories about jobs, co-workers, and training events.
I had to wonder why I “needed” a tangible item to remind me of my time in New York or any other place for that matter. I can rationalize why one would want a token, such as a small statue of the Eiffel Tower to remember a visit to Paris. A religious item from visiting a cathedral. Even rocks or seashells which can be used as decorative items. But a laptop?
But truth is the attachment was emotional response to fill a need. For me, I think it was to help me feel that I can do as well in Arizona as I did in New York. My physical limitation became more pronounced with time which is why I moved to Tucson.
Well, It’s September. The Autumn season is near and although I will miss seeing the changes in nature in the Northeast & Northwest, I will be able to enjoy the cooler nights here with open windows.
A time for new beginnings and new ideas to emerge to uplift my life and, hopefully, others.
Blessings to you and your family.
Millie Padilla 